Sorry guys but.... LOL

[Decado2 10+ year member]

Lightning never strikes twice in one place because Chuck Norris is looking for it.

Chuck Norris wears Orion's Belt around his pinky toe and he eats with the Big Dipper.

Chuck Norris uses Tabasco Sauce for eye drops.

Chuck Norris can get Blackjack with just one card.

There is no Control button on Chuck Norris' computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Chuck Norris can split the atom. With his bare hands.

Chuck Norris is not only a noun, but a verb.

Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.

When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.

When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.

Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.

Chuck Norris doesn't say "who's your daddy", because he knows the answer

Click to read more...

 

[Decado2 10+ year member]

Chuck Norris does not get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris'd.

When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror nothing appears. There can never be a second Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.

When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.

Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.

Chuck Norris uses red hot lava to moisturize his skin.

Chuck Norris does not age. Every birthday, it's just another year added to his existence, which sucks for you.

Chuck Norris beat the Sun in a staring contest.

Some people get lucky and kill two birds with one stone. Chuck Norris once killed four birds with half a stone. What's that? You say there's no such thing as half a stone? The four dead birds didn't think so either.

Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.

Chuck Norris is allowed to talk about Fight Club.

Chuck Norris once played 18 holes of golf using a 12 inch strip of rebar and a sun dried tomato. He shot a 54.

Chuck Norris' smile once brought a puppy back to life.

Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident....and still managed to walk it off.

Chuck Norris IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

Chuck Norris understands the ending of 2001: A Space Odyssey.

Chuck Norris floats like a butterfly and stings like a tomahawk missile. At mach 3. In the face.

Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to spice up his steaks.

Before the boogeyman goes to sleep he checks his closet and under the bed for Chuck Norris.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.

While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

Archeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his *** kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.

Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas

Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

When J. Robert Oppenheimer said "I am become death, the destroyer Of worlds", He was not referring to the atomic bomb. He was referring to the Chuck Norris halloween costume he was wearing.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

 

[Apocalypse boy 10+ year member]

Lol

 

[bk12321 10+ year member]

chuck norris can delete the recycling bin //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

 

[CRXBMPN 5,000+ posts]

chuck norris can delete the recycling bin //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/eek.gif.771b7a90cf45cabdc554ff1121c21c4a.gif //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/eek.gif.771b7a90cf45cabdc554ff1121c21c4a.gif WOOOOOOOOW thats impressive!

 

[Chuck Norris 10+ year member]

Fear me!

 

[yanks fan 10+ year member]

If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his *** kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.

It generated about 47,800 results:fyi:

 

[Fusion_FREAK 10+ year member]

Fear me!

LOL //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif

 

[bk12321 10+ year member]

//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/eek.gif.771b7a90cf45cabdc554ff1121c21c4a.gif //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/eek.gif.771b7a90cf45cabdc554ff1121c21c4a.gif WOOOOOOOOW thats impressive!

i know what a beastttt

 

[wat 10+ year member]

i say chuck norris VS teh savage

prepare for death //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

 

[mtlhead 10+ year member]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLO1YIWQuXE&feature=related

chuck norris getting his *** kicked //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

 

[05fronty 5,000+ posts]

hulk hogan owns chuck norris and randy savage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that is all

 

[matte 10+ year member]

i think this is the 32897349237th time ive seen these lol

 

[05fronty 5,000+ posts]

i like these threads!!!!!!!!

 

[jdc753 10+ year member]