Wow... 4 pages.
I guess most of why I was depressed was this kid (justin) died who i worked with from some bad drugs. Plus my "friend" told me last night "No you can't ****ing come over, I'm gonna get laid, we got these chicks coming over. Call me some other time." I really wanted to talk to him about this... Justin's death kina hit me hard i guess cause I never really grieved for my friend who comitted ******* this summer. So, as you can imagine, paranoia/grief/nothing to do with my hands and the internet got me being EMO.
I just felt bad (prety bad actually) and had nowhere to unload. Good advice here, especially from faulkton. (I don't know whether I should pos rep you or not..)
I suppose the emo episode is over... Monday after Justins funeral I'm getting my shit together, got a lotta work to do to get my hooptie rides rollin. Thanks so much everyone who posted, even though it was tough love it made me feel alot better, even gave me some ideas.