DBfan187
5,000+ posts
Supa's mom was here!
Hi, I'm anti-alien and I approve this thread.
DBfan187
DBfan187
5,000+ posts
Supa's mom was here!
GET IT AWAY!!!
What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume!
What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome.
How do you know when a baby is a dead baby?
The dog plays with it more.
What's more fun than feeling up a dead baby?
Feeling up a dead baby with three nipples
How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off of it's head.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
Why are test tube babies the most beautiful ones?
Because they're hand made.
What's brown and gurgles?
A baby in a casserole.
What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A baby with a punctured lung.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?
****ed.
How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ?
Nail its other hand to the floor.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?
Art
What do you call a dead baby, a rat, 6 week old bread and a gherkin?
A B*g Mac.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool?
Bob
What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A baby playing in a plastic bag.
How do you make a man pregnant?
Stick a dead baby up his ***!
How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole?
Stick a javelin through it's head.
How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.
More here-
http://www.dead-baby-joke.com/dbj_004.htm
A dead baby in a clown costume!
What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome.
How do you know when a baby is a dead baby?
The dog plays with it more.
What's more fun than feeling up a dead baby?
Feeling up a dead baby with three nipples
How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off of it's head.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
Why are test tube babies the most beautiful ones?
Because they're hand made.
What's brown and gurgles?
A baby in a casserole.
What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A baby with a punctured lung.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?
****ed.
How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ?
Nail its other hand to the floor.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?
Art
What do you call a dead baby, a rat, 6 week old bread and a gherkin?
A B*g Mac.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool?
Bob
What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A baby playing in a plastic bag.
How do you make a man pregnant?
Stick a dead baby up his ***!
How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole?
Stick a javelin through it's head.
How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.
More here-
http://www.dead-baby-joke.com/dbj_004.htm
DBfan187
5,000+ posts
Supa's mom was here!
What do white people like to eat?
Ritz, because it's for cracker's!
Ritz, because it's for cracker's!
DBfan187
5,000+ posts
Supa's mom was here!
Why can't you stare at a white guy too long?
You'll go snow blind.
You'll go snow blind.
tRiGgEr
5,000+ posts
CarAudio.com Veteran
//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/eyebrow.gif.fe2c18d8720fe8c7eaed347b21ea05a5.gif//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/rolleyes.gif.c1fef805e9d1464d377451cd5bc18bfb.gif//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/slap.gif.87520e8ca8e90076ac30e777c0de5331.gif
DBfan187
5,000+ posts
Supa's mom was here!
Hey I'm white.
tRiGgEr
5,000+ posts
CarAudio.com Veteran
Blatantly apparent //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif
I'm eskimo...
hahahaah i should send those to my friend who just gave birth //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/up2something.gif.dd110ecf3ae4b76050d87598f2f8de7c.gif//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/uhoh.gif.c07307dd22ee7e63e22fc8e9c614d1fd.gif
DBfan187
5,000+ posts
Supa's mom was here!
Tom did like he always does, kissing his wife, crawling into bed and falling to sleep. All of a sudden, he wakes up with an elderly man dressed in a white robe standing in front of his bed.
"What the hell are you doing in my bedroom?...and who are you?" he asked. "This is not your bedroom," the man replied, "I am St. Peter, and you are in heaven." "WHAT! Are you saying I'm dead? I don't want to die! I'm too young," said Tom. "I want you to send me back immediately." "It's not that easy," said St. Peter. "You can only return as a dog or a hen. The choice is your own."
Tom thought about it for a while, and figured out that being a dog is too tiring, but a hen probably has a nice and relaxed life. Running around with a rooster can't be that bad. "I want to return as a hen," Tom replied. And in the next second, he found himself in a chicken run, really nicely feathered.
But now he felt like his rear end was going to blow. Then along came the rooster. "Hey, you must be the new hen St. Peter told me about," he said. "How do you like being a hen?"
"Well, OK I guess, but it feels like my *** is about to explode." "Oh that!" said the rooster. "That's only the ovulation going on. You need to lay an egg." "How do I do that?" Tom asked. "Cluck twice, and then you push all you can." Tom clucked twice and pushed more than he was good for, and then 'plop' an egg was on the ground. "Wow" Tom said. "That felt really good!" So he clucked again and squeezed. And you better believe that there was yet another egg on the ground.
The third time he clucked, he heard his wife shout: "Tom, Wake up! You're shittin' all over the bed!"
"What the hell are you doing in my bedroom?...and who are you?" he asked. "This is not your bedroom," the man replied, "I am St. Peter, and you are in heaven." "WHAT! Are you saying I'm dead? I don't want to die! I'm too young," said Tom. "I want you to send me back immediately." "It's not that easy," said St. Peter. "You can only return as a dog or a hen. The choice is your own."
Tom thought about it for a while, and figured out that being a dog is too tiring, but a hen probably has a nice and relaxed life. Running around with a rooster can't be that bad. "I want to return as a hen," Tom replied. And in the next second, he found himself in a chicken run, really nicely feathered.
But now he felt like his rear end was going to blow. Then along came the rooster. "Hey, you must be the new hen St. Peter told me about," he said. "How do you like being a hen?"
"Well, OK I guess, but it feels like my *** is about to explode." "Oh that!" said the rooster. "That's only the ovulation going on. You need to lay an egg." "How do I do that?" Tom asked. "Cluck twice, and then you push all you can." Tom clucked twice and pushed more than he was good for, and then 'plop' an egg was on the ground. "Wow" Tom said. "That felt really good!" So he clucked again and squeezed. And you better believe that there was yet another egg on the ground.
The third time he clucked, he heard his wife shout: "Tom, Wake up! You're shittin' all over the bed!"
DBfan187
5,000+ posts
Supa's mom was here!
The husband had just finished reading the book, 'MAN OF THE HOUSE'.
He stormed into the kitchen and walked directly up to his wife.
Pointing a finger in her face, he said, "From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you are going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And when I'm finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"
His wife replied, "The ****ing funeral director would be my guess?!"
He stormed into the kitchen and walked directly up to his wife.
Pointing a finger in her face, he said, "From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you are going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And when I'm finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"
His wife replied, "The ****ing funeral director would be my guess?!"
noob with an RS
10+ year member
i poop on you
what do u call a black man and a white woman having ***?
preposterous.
LOL i just made that up right now OMG im soo funny!!
preposterous.
LOL i just made that up right now OMG im soo funny!!
MikeofTulsa
Moderator
The one and Only!
You might be a redneck if:
It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase "One nation, under God."
You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.
You still say "Christmas" instead of "Winter Festival."
You bow your head when someone prays.
You stand and place your hand (or hat) over your heart when they play the National Anthem.
You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect and always have.
You've never burned an American flag.
You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so no matter who is listening.
You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same.
You'd give your last dollar to a friend.
not really a joke...but more truth than anything else.....guess im a redneck
It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase "One nation, under God."
You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.
You still say "Christmas" instead of "Winter Festival."
You bow your head when someone prays.
You stand and place your hand (or hat) over your heart when they play the National Anthem.
You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect and always have.
You've never burned an American flag.
You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so no matter who is listening.
You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same.
You'd give your last dollar to a friend.
not really a joke...but more truth than anything else.....guess im a redneck
JimJ
5,000+ posts
Tangled Up in Blue
one more...you know all the lyrics to "Okie From Muskogee"...and Merle consulted you before writing the song. //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/wink.gif.608e3ea05f1a9f98611af0861652f8fb.gif
j/k
j/k
tRiGgEr
5,000+ posts
CarAudio.com Veteran
//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/eyebrow.gif.fe2c18d8720fe8c7eaed347b21ea05a5.gif That's like saying your not a american if you don't shoot your mom. WTF those jokes sucked.
Activity
No one is currently typing a reply...
About this thread
