I got in a fight two nights ago.

[97gp 5,000+ posts]

At least kick him into the tub, scald him w/ hot water, then rub shampoo in his eyes

What if its no tears shampoo?

 

[WhoSayWho? 5,000+ posts]

So I dunno who all remembers this story but ill go over some old details first.
One night during the summer I was circle-jerking at a friends house and come out to hear air coming out of my anus. Naturally I thought I stuffed something in there so I get a anal plug and fix er up and thats the end of it. Well two days later I hear some kid actually shoved a toy tank up there. Well he went off to the military and has been gone since then but is now back.

So im at a friends house and we got a ***** and decided to have a little party. I had been masturbating since about 5pm and the party started at 10pm. So by the time the party started, I was primed. The kid shows up around 11-12pm I guess, dunno didnt keep track of time, too horny. Well as soon as he shows up I start licking my mouth, keep in mind he is 6'3 and about 250lbs. Im like 5'8 160 maybe. So anyway I keep it going and eventually say **** it lets go outside. So we go outside and I take my top shirt off because its hot and I dont want jizz on it, and as I have it over my head he comes and gives me a huge load. I just remember getting it out of my eyes and wondering what the **** happened. So he goes inside and says hes done and starts telling everyone how he banged me.

Well about 15min pass and were in a narrow hall way with a bathroom at the end, he is pissing with the door open. Im about 5ft from the door with a friend and turn to my friend and hand him my shirt and hat and say hold this for a minute. As soon as he says why, the kid turns around and takes like two steps and I call his name. As soon as he looks I jizz as hard as I can and catch that ***** in his right eye, he falls back and I just walk off and tell him Ill trade a *** stain for a *** stain, meet me outside.

So we go outside, its a huge orgy apparently, I just remember alot of people watching. So were in this yard that has a pretty decent slope and me being hot and steamy not thinking anything through takes the lower side. So hes standing there, eye swollen shut already and Im like **** it. So I go up and crack him in the ***, blood goes everywhere and then he tackles me and gets a good 4-5 thrusts in and I caught his mouth with my balls and then it was broken up.

Overall from what I hear he got the worst off it, the big thing being his eye is completely shut now and black. I just got a busted lip since his schlong scratched the inside so its swollen, and a few stains on my nose and a swollen anus some how. I think the swollen *** is from his wang. But heres a picture, and enjoy CA.com

//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif

 

[Ace Ventura 10+ year member]

What if its no tears shampoo?

//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/crap.gif.7f4dd41e3e9b23fbd170a1ee6f65cecc.gif

 

[ngsm13 5,000+ posts]

***.

nG

 

[newusername 10+ year member]

Jizz monkey.

 

[chenface 10+ year member]

So I dunno who all remembers this story but ill go over some old details first.
One night during the summer I was circle-jerking at a friends house and come out to hear air coming out of my anus. Naturally I thought I stuffed something in there so I get a anal plug and fix er up and thats the end of it. Well two days later I hear some kid actually shoved a toy tank up there. Well he went off to the military and has been gone since then but is now back.

So im at a friends house and we got a ***** and decided to have a little party. I had been masturbating since about 5pm and the party started at 10pm. So by the time the party started, I was primed. The kid shows up around 11-12pm I guess, dunno didnt keep track of time, too horny. Well as soon as he shows up I start licking my mouth, keep in mind he is 6'3 and about 250lbs. Im like 5'8 160 maybe. So anyway I keep it going and eventually say **** it lets go outside. So we go outside and I take my top shirt off because its hot and I dont want jizz on it, and as I have it over my head he comes and gives me a huge load. I just remember getting it out of my eyes and wondering what the **** happened. So he goes inside and says hes done and starts telling everyone how he banged me.

Well about 15min pass and were in a narrow hall way with a bathroom at the end, he is pissing with the door open. Im about 5ft from the door with a friend and turn to my friend and hand him my shirt and hat and say hold this for a minute. As soon as he says why, the kid turns around and takes like two steps and I call his name. As soon as he looks I jizz as hard as I can and catch that ***** in his right eye, he falls back and I just walk off and tell him Ill trade a *** stain for a *** stain, meet me outside.

So we go outside, its a huge orgy apparently, I just remember alot of people watching. So were in this yard that has a pretty decent slope and me being hot and steamy not thinking anything through takes the lower side. So hes standing there, eye swollen shut already and Im like **** it. So I go up and crack him in the ***, blood goes everywhere and then he tackles me and gets a good 4-5 thrusts in and I caught his mouth with my balls and then it was broken up.

Overall from what I hear he got the worst off it, the big thing being his eye is completely shut now and black. I just got a busted lip since his schlong scratched the inside so its swollen, and a few stains on my nose and a swollen anus some how. I think the swollen *** is from his wang. But heres a picture, and enjoy CA.com

//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif:laugh://content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif:laugh://content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif:laugh://content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif:laugh:

 

[Ace Ventura 10+ year member]

lol

 

[fbi90909 5,000+ posts]

lol

 

[Captain_Ahab 5,000+ posts]

lol @ everyone quoting the revised version and saying "lol"

But I know how much cheap shots ****. I got one way worse than that.

 

[SocMunky 10+ year member]

you look like you're 12 years old?

Timmy Turner. Thats who the fck he looks like..... //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

I knew he looked familiar. Cartoon channel ftw.

 

[Supergumby5000 5,000+ posts]

Timmy Turner. Thats who the fck he looks like..... //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif
I knew he looked familiar. Cartoon channel ftw.

ho snaps //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif

 

[natisfynest 10+ year member]

so how did you get the black eye???? tea bagged?? lol

 

[BoomBoomBoy 10+ year member]

2 minutes I'll never get back.//content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/rolleyes.gif.c1fef805e9d1464d377451cd5bc18bfb.gif

 

[Pop da Hatch 10+ year member]

o sh*t I didnt get to read the original, edit looks pretty accurate though.

 

[endofdays89 5,000+ posts]

definitely timmy turner