yea i get that but she wouldnt accept anything we said even if it was good.
Just wait 'till you have a wife. You'll figure out pretty dam^ fast that "pissed at the dishes not getting done" means something TOTALLY different. It could mean anything, and you gotta' blow it off or expect a loooong evening of "serious discussions".
It could mean a bad day at work, or she caught you doing something you shouldn't, that she doesn't want to bring up right away, or even "she's just pissed at the dishes not being done".
Some times, it's best to walk away and not stoke the fire. Seriously.
Anyone who thinks the parent needs to kneel down to their kids, for fear of legal recourse, is a f'ing retard. Kids need direction, and if they're asking for a little bit of harshness because they do it themselves, so be it. You posted only one side of the story -- admit it.
Yea, parents can cross the line and call a little girl "fat" until she kills herself in her teens, or tell a boy "he'll never make it as a real man" his entire life and make fun of his privates, so he turns into some psycho gay serial killer. That's scarring for life, but being a real, caring, ambitious, dilligent, adoring, loving, and not f'ed up parent, is difficult. You can't be a total puss and expect the kid to have any chance. Some times, you have to be an ******* and get the job done as a parent, plain and simple. If you don't, when it's necessary, you don't give a crap how they turn out.
If you're a fcuk to the kid all the time, for no reason, then yea, screw you as a parent. Otherwise, stand up. Be a parent. Teach. Be strong -- that's where they'll get it from. Don't abuse. Just show -- what is right, what is wrong. Enforce the fact that they are intelligent enough to distinguish the difference for themselves, particularly when they're on their own.