Dream as If you will live forever,
Live as if you're going to die today.
"After all is said and done, a lot more will be said than done." --Unknown
"Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible." --Doug Larson
Live as if you're going to die today.
"After all is said and done, a lot more will be said than done." --Unknown
"Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible." --Doug Larson
VOA_NIGHTMARE
10+ year member
CarAudio.com Veteran
"Having *** is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner,
you'd better have a good hand."
Woody Allen
"Bisexuality immediately
doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
Rodney Dangerfield
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase ****** arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."
Lynn Lavner
"*** at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
Camille Paglia
"*** is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The
other eight are unimportant."
George Burns
"Women might be able to
fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship."
Sharon Stone
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-*****."
Jack Nicholson
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he
lives, but he never forgets oral ***, no matter how bad it is."
Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a
sense of humor)
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip
out a man's genitals through his wallet."
Robin Williams
"Women need a reason to have ***. Men just need a place."
Billy Crystal
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more
comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front
of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course,
men are just grateful."
Robert De Niro
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Dustin Hoffman
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because
men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody *****'."
Jerry Seinfeld
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a
penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams
"It's been so long since I've had ***, I've forgotten who
ties up whom."
Joan Rivers
"*** is one of the most wholesome,
beautiful and natural experiences money can buy."
Steve Martin
" You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little
things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay
good money for in later life."
Elmo Phillips
" Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
Oscar Wilde
" It isn't premarital *** if you have no intention of getting married."
George Burns
you'd better have a good hand."
Woody Allen
"Bisexuality immediately
doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
Rodney Dangerfield
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase ****** arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."
Lynn Lavner
"*** at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
Camille Paglia
"*** is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The
other eight are unimportant."
George Burns
"Women might be able to
fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship."
Sharon Stone
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-*****."
Jack Nicholson
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he
lives, but he never forgets oral ***, no matter how bad it is."
Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a
sense of humor)
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip
out a man's genitals through his wallet."
Robin Williams
"Women need a reason to have ***. Men just need a place."
Billy Crystal
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more
comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front
of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course,
men are just grateful."
Robert De Niro
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Dustin Hoffman
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because
men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody *****'."
Jerry Seinfeld
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a
penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams
"It's been so long since I've had ***, I've forgotten who
ties up whom."
Joan Rivers
"*** is one of the most wholesome,
beautiful and natural experiences money can buy."
Steve Martin
" You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little
things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay
good money for in later life."
Elmo Phillips
" Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
Oscar Wilde
" It isn't premarital *** if you have no intention of getting married."
George Burns
"There are only two things that are infinite. The universe and human stupidity. I'm not so sure about the universe."
- Albert Einstein
"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."
- Douglas Adams
"A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.'"
- Marvin The Robot (Douglas Adams)
"We have normality, I repeat we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem"
- Trillian - Douglas Adams
"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
-Douglas Adams
"Quickly, Gir! RIDE THE PIG!"
- Invader Zim
- Albert Einstein
"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."
- Douglas Adams
"A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.'"
- Marvin The Robot (Douglas Adams)
"We have normality, I repeat we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem"
- Trillian - Douglas Adams
"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened."
-Douglas Adams
"Quickly, Gir! RIDE THE PIG!"
- Invader Zim
A new car built by my company leave somewhere traveling at 60 miles per hour. The rear differential locks up. The car crashes and burns with everyone trapped inside. Now, should we initiate a recall? Take the number of vehicles in the field (A) multiply it by the probable rate of failure (B) then multiply the result by the average out of court settlement ©. A times B times C equals X. If X is less than the cost of the recall, we don't do one.
negativezeroz
5,000+ posts
Nothing Is Promised
If nothing sticks to teflon, then why does teflon stick to the pan?
jmeifert893
10+ year member
Member
what a long strange trip its been
bigluis
10+ year member
the youngest member
what are some good quotes byt 2pac i heard was it was like " today was a dark day but everyday after that will be a lighter one " or something like that i heard it like a couple weeks ago
pj_chevy03
10+ year member
please ban me
Be rebellious and have no quote.
JimJ
5,000+ posts
Tangled Up in Blue
I still ******** manually.
a dumb thing we do is put fake quotes from other friends like mine is "Matt Sapp: I think I caught something bad last night."
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