This post is for Flip if he hasn't seen it already.
THE FOLLOWING AD(?) WAS POSTED ON CRAIGS LIST IN NEW YORK CITY LAST MONTH
(MID-SEPTEMBER OF '07) BY A "WOMAN" LOOKING FOR HER SOUL(?) MATE:
Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes
at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in
mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City , so I
don't think I'm overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives?
Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average
around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock.
250,00 0 won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class
who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not
as
pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right?
How do I get to her level?
Here are my questions specifically:
Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me
specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms
What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings
Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?
Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys.
I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village.
What's the story there?
Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make?
And where do they
hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY! please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in
an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up
front
about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to
match
them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and
hearth.
HERE WAS THE RESPONSE, FROM A GUY AT JP MORGAN WHO FORGOT TO
REMOVE HIS COMPANY SIGNATURE AND HAS SINCE CLAIMED HE JUST FORWARDED
IT AND WAS NOT THE ORIGINAL AUTHOR . . . OOOPS:
Dear Pers-:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year.
That said here's how I see it.
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simply
a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what
you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I
bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade
and my money will likely continue into pe rpetui ty...in fact, it is
very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty
that you won't be getting any more beautiful!
So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins
in earnest. By 35 I'd probably stick a fork in you!
So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a
buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business
sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease.
In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following.
If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need
an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not
marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about effi cient markets. So, I
wonder
why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has
been unable
to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as
gorgeous as you say
you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
Please, let me know.
Rob Campbell
J.P.Morgan
Diversified Industrials Investment Banking
277 Park Avenue , 16/F, New York , NY 10172
