Crunk Times, My friend.....Crunk Times

[Banana Balls 5,000+ posts]

Heh, we dated for almost 4 years. Even though I haven't talked to her in a long *** time... I can't get myself to post her number.

You can PM it to me like Flip did. All I want is an avatar with my name written on her *****.

I won't even call her. The transaction will be via text.

 

[Jameseypoo 5,000+ posts]

Here. Photoshop your name on her forehead.

 

[DBfan187 5,000+ posts]

No that's not me. lol I'm not mexican.

 

[Banana Balls 5,000+ posts]

No, gimme a **** shot and some whipped cream. That is what I desire.

 

[Banana Balls 5,000+ posts]

BTW, why are you the only cool person in that picture? You shouldn't hang out with retards. That's not how you roll.

 

[Jameseypoo 5,000+ posts]

BTW, why are you the only cool person in that picture? You shouldn't hang out with retards. That's not how you roll.

Those aren't my friends. They are in the frat that her sorority always hangs out with. Hence me no longer talking to her.

 

[DBfan187 5,000+ posts]

This is dedication:

Broncos' Pittman muscle his way in

By Lee Rasizer, Rocky Mountain News (Contact)

Published October 17, 2008 at 11:36 p.m.

About those biceps

Don't tell Michael Pittman the gun show's in town, that a couple of pythons are running loose, he's winning the arms race, or he should play on his hands instead of his legs. He's heard all the jokes.

"They're just jealous of me," the Broncos' new starting running back says with a smile.

A prison yard full of cons pumping iron would be envious.

This is a guy who's more ripped than a student's spiral notebook.

"It's not fair to compare him to everybody else," Broncos rookie fullback Spencer Larsen marveled.

In the offseason, when Pittman's strengthening of his body for the rigors of the NFL season is at its intense peak, his bulging biceps are 21 1/2 inches in diameter pre-workout, 23 inches at full flex.

They're so big that the stocky, 6-foot Pittman actually loses about 2 inches as preparations shift out of the weight room and onto the field.

Purposely.

Just like that, 2 inches most guys would kill for, gone as part of his 15-to-18-pound slim-down to get to his playing weight. He doesn't want to be too bulky and prevent himself from nestling the football properly, so he's down to about 20 inches or slightly less - fully pumped - now.

But shedding muscle has its conveniences, too.

After all, Pittman's "Stretch Armstrong" physique - he's got a 38-inch waist - requires tailored suits that can drape properly off the 240 pounds he carries at his heaviest in the spring. While many believe he's vain by wearing tank tops or rolling up his uniform sleeves to expose his tattoo reading, "The Real Black Superman," there's a comfort element, too.

An off-the-rack, long-sleeved shirt is just too constricting.

That's just the half of it.

"The thing is, too, I walk into a doctor's office and the blood-pressure wrap doesn't fit around my arm," Pittman said. "They try to squeeze it, and the things busting off because it doesn't fit. I say, 'Hey, I'm sorry.' But it's just me. They've got to find a bigger wrap."

Rapping about his body is another matter.

Pittman doesn't appear to be narcissistic but is proud of his physique because of the preparation it has taken to get himself in the type of condition that often draws stares. He transformed a skinny, 184-pound, sprinter-type physique his freshman year at Fresno State to where he is now - in his 11th professional season at age 33.

Pittman can bench 485 pounds. He does 505-pound shoulder-shrug sets. On the leg press, he regularly pushes 1,500 pounds as part of his offseason routine.

"He's a massive man," said Broncos fullback Peyton Hillis, who is fairly stout himself and often wears cutoff sleeves as a friendly dig at Pittman. "And as big as he is, you'd think he's as mean as a rattlesnake. But he's not."

The man does know how to put in a mean workout, though.

PUMPING UP

At the Powerhouse Gym in Tampa, Fla., the clientele isn't talking about Miller Lite when six-packs are discussed. Buff has nothing to do with waxing their convertibles. Models, pro athletes and amateur bodybuilders come through the facility's doors to give their muscles muscles. Hulk Hogan even stops by there when he's in town.

It was at that facility that Pittman landed this past offseason after years of working out on his own in the months preceding various camps.

A nagging ankle injury with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers kept him out of five games last year, marking the first games he'd missed in eight seasons. He was a pending free agent, too, facing an uncertain future after six seasons with the Buccaneers that included a Super Bowl championship.

"I needed that extra push," Pittman said.

He got it from John Toomer, who runs his own personal-training company called whosnext Fitness, and has worked with the likes of major leaguer Gary Sheffield and boxer Winky Wright, among others.

Toomer and Pittman initially talked about the type of program the running back might want, first to build back his body post-injury by concentrating on his lower torso, then to maximum levels of fitness everywhere. The routine ultimately became a mixture of sports-specific and bodybuilding sets.

Six days a week, with Sundays off, Pittman's workouts lasted between an hour and 45 minutes and two hours.

In the past, working alone, Pittman concentrated on back and biceps one day, chest and triceps the next, then legs and shoulders the next day, all twice a week. But Toomer mixed up the exercises to stress functional gains with reps aimed at producing aesthetic results.

"I just gave him enough rest between exercises as (the length of) a play would be," Toomer said. "Sometimes, he'd look at me crazy when I'd push him. But Mike would do it."

It's getting other players to train with Pittman that has become problematic.

The running back admitted six or seven workout partners fell by the wayside throughout the years because of the intensity of his workouts.

The biggest complaints: the need for five to 10 minutes between exercises, not the quick turnarounds he preferred.

Buccaneers wide receiver Michael Clayton, with Toomer directing him, was the first teammate to actually stick with Pittman past a couple of weeks.

"He really gets after it every single day," Clayton said. "He does a lot of special exercises that works all the separate individual muscles. That's how he gets his definition. But he's a guy who really puts in the work."

In fact, Toomer, who also gets amateur bodybuilders ready for competition, added that Pittman's commitment is such "that he separates himself from all the other guys I work with. . . . He lives it. We call it 'being the gym.' Don't come in the gym, be the gym. And Mike is that."

One reason Pittman is, as Toomer described him, "a beast," is that it isn't just the weight he can put up, but the control and ease with which he throws up the plates. That explosive element often had the folks at Powerhouse Gym gathered around to witness Pittman's regimen. Many of those bystanders sport 20-inch-plus biceps themselves.

"Mike puts those guys, I don't want to say to shame, but he does it so easily and so explosively . . . that they have to compliment Mike," Toomer said. "Mike used to come in there and rock the house."

 

[DBfan187 5,000+ posts]

continued.............

SUPERBERO WORSHIP
As a child, Pittman was transfixed by superheroes: He-Man, Mega Man, The Incredible Hulk and others.

"There was something about muscles," he said. "It may have rubbed off on me as I got older."

He began lifting weights as a freshman in high school, but back then, it was more important to be seen by the cheerleaders in the weight room.

As a senior in Mira Mesa, Calif., near San Diego, he had washboard abs and speed to burn but no real size. It wasn't until after his first year at Fresno State that he got serious with barbells and dumbbells and started taking creatine, which supplies energy to muscle and nerve cells.

"It was Division I football and something I wasn't used to," he said. "I was quick making moves and making people miss, but when it came to blocking, I didn't have the size and strength really to be successful in that area. That's when I started getting serious about bulking up if I was going to last. And once I started seeing some growth, some muscle size, I took it to a different level."

By the time he left college, he had grown to 220 pounds and was benching more than 400. His commitment since the Arizona Cardinals selected him in the fourth round of the 1998 NFL draft, with stops in Tampa Bay (2002-07) and now Denver, has been unwavering.

"I'd get magazines and I'd look at the bodybuilder workouts: Ronnie Coleman, Flex. And I'd see what they'd do and what they'd eat," he said. "I stole Ronnie's diet - he's a big bodybuilder - along with the Flex workout. I mixed them together, and I started taking tabs on what they did. And once I started doing that, I created my own thing, even though it was half theirs."

His discipline in the weight room was matched only by his aversion to the fast-food drive-through. Nearly everything he eats is plain, particularly during his offseason training. He doesn't even use ketchup, mustard or mayonnaise to dress up sandwiches.

Chicken's topped only with salt and pepper. Pasta is slathered only with sauce. If he eats meat on his spaghetti, it's turkey.

The diet is replete with calories in the morning but tapers off during the day.

"You have to feed the machine," Toomer said. "You eat like a king during breakfast, a prince during lunch and a pauper at dinner."

Pittman admits to cheating somewhat with an occasional slice of pizza or some fried chicken during the regular season because his body requires it in order to withstand the rigors of training camp, practices and games.

He also has to tone down his workouts during the season, while his body is being broken down. Pittman adheres to the routines set forth by Broncos strength coach Rich Tuten and attempts to do slightly more.

"He's a genetic freak," Hillis said. "But he works hard at it, too."

Pittman's a big believer in protein shakes and supplements to augment that diligence. He said he religiously takes three products by the BSN nutritional-supplement company: Cellmass, N.O.-Xplode and Nitrix.

He also knows there are skeptics who look suspiciously at his body and immediately presume he's using steroids.

"It's almost like a compliment to me because I work out hard," said Pittman, who regularly is tested by the NFL, including 12 times during one offseason, and was deemed clean each time.

"There's no way I could pass the drug test if I took something."

Toomer checks the contents of each supplement Pittman takes against the NFL's list of banned substances and reaches out to strength coaches he knows to make sure there are no ingredients that would put Pittman's livelihood in jeopardy.

"I can guarantee you, Mike's a natural guy," said Toomer, who physically resembles gentle giant John Coffey from the movie The Green Mile.

"Some guys are just born with that," he said. "You look at

LeBron James. He's born with that. Mike's just like that. He's a beast."

BUILT TO LAST IN NFL

There's an old expression: Looks like Tarzan, plays like Jane.

If Pittman couldn't help the Broncos, it wouldn't matter if he does 90-pound dumbbell curls with each arm or dead lifts 405 pounds, which he does.

"This guy is just ridiculously big," Broncos quarterback Jay Cutler said. "You see guys like that, but most guys that are built like that aren't good football players. He's built like that, and he's a great football player."

Pittman is solid in the pass-protection realm that started him on his fitness path, ranks No. 3 in receptions among all active running backs, averages 4.1 rushing yards on 1,365 career carries and, after five weeks of playing a third-down, goal-line role, has grabbed the No. 1 job with the Broncos.

He heads into Monday night's nationally televised game against New England as the first Broncos running back to crack 100 yards rushing in a game since Week 13 last season. And he's enjoyed the ride.

"It's been great," Pittman said. "There's been frustrating times, when I first got here, of course. I really didn't know the offense, and then I came out on the second or third day of camp and hurt my hamstring and I went through my down times because I couldn't really go out there and be myself. A lot of the preseason games, I was playing with my hamstring still hurt. I wasn't explosive. But I wasn't trying to make any excuses with the coaches, and I went out there and played with it.

"But now that I'm healthy and I know the offense, I'm not second-guessing myself. I'm just out there playing, letting the game come to me and making big plays. And you really see me exploding through the hole and making some cuts."

He also has scored a team-leading four touchdowns.

Each one has been culminated by, yes, showing off those massive biceps.

His end-zone flex is a tradition that dates to his days with the Cardinals and is a byproduct of his pride in his body.

"That," he said, "is just Michael Pittman's signature move."

Calories to Burn

Michael Pittman works out six days a week as part of intensive offseason workouts for nearly two hours a day. He supplements his physical activity with a strict diet. Here's a typical offseason-meal schedule for the Broncos running back:

Breakfast

Five to six scrambled egg whites

Oatmeal

Wheat pancakes or wheat toast

Fruit

Protein shake

Lunch

Half-chicken

New potatoes

Green beans or corn

Lemonade

Midafternoon snack

Turkey sandwich

Plain baked potato with salt

Water

Dinner

Spaghetti, chicken or steak

Vegetables

Potatoes

Water

Bedtime

Protein shake

Workout Warrior

Michael Pittman will do two to three sets of these various common exercises in the gym during offseason workouts:

Flat bench press with dumbbells: 160 pounds each arm for eight reps

Barbell shoulder shrug: 505 pounds, 10 repetitions

Barbell upright rows: 225 pounds, 10 reps

Dumbbell curls: 90 pounds each arm, eight reps

Biceps curls, straight bar: 165 to 170 pounds, eight to10 times

Leg sled: 1,300 to 1,500 pounds, eight to 10 times

Bench press: 485-pound maximum, 350 pounds as part of regular routine, eight to 10 times

Dead lift: 405 pounds, six reps (one set)

 

[SocMunky 10+ year member]

continued.............

Yup, I remember people referring to him as popeye-arms when he was here in Tampa. //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

 

[Tiger Bass 5,000+ posts]

Roids much?

 

[bdawson72 5,000+ posts]

Whew, he shrugs 505 in stets of 10. woooooooow.

I MIGHT be able to shrug 225 in a set of 10. Even then I'd probably be tired as shit.

It does however make me want to get back into the weight room. Losing 50-60 pounds has crushed my strength.

 

[Tiger Bass 5,000+ posts]

My max shrug is 245 in a set of 10 reps.

 

[bdawson72 5,000+ posts]

Must be nice. Bitch.

See me on teh squat rack. LOL

 

[Tiger Bass 5,000+ posts]

My max 10 rep squat is only about 190 right now. Used to be about 220 before I stopped working out over the summer.

 

[bdawson72 5,000+ posts]

Lat time I did it which was about 2 months ago i did 335 10 times.

I miss being as strong as i used to though. I feel little and insignificant now. //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/frown.gif.a3531fa0534503350665a1e957861287.gif