Why are people so ghey?

[dan7532 10+ year member]

Okay, so I go to this graduation party tonight and it's horribly lame. So my buddy is gonna go home, so he drops me off. I'm drunker than a chicken so I decide a great idea would be to walk around my neighborhood and see if there are any other late-night drunks out and about. I hear people chatting and realize it's a party. The gate is open to the back yard and i'm hammered so my water-thirsty brain tells me to enter at my own convenience. I stroll on in and am greeted by what seem like friendly folk. They say, "Hi. What's your name? Are you friends with Johnny?". To which I reply, "Hi, I'm Dan. OF COURSE I'M FRIENDS WITH JOHNNY, why else would I be here?". And the girl about my age (19) replies, "Oh yeah? Cuz I'm Johnny's little sister and I've never met you." Everybody asks for my last name, I reply, everyone says, "this is a private party, you need to leave" to which I respond, "okay, i'm on my way, thanks for your friendliness and hospitality." I walk away only to be chased down by about 12 HUGE Mother-honkers that must roid and lift every hour of the day. They surround me and tell me I need to leave. I tell them I am trying and they are impeding my progress. They say, "You need to leave right now, I'm gonna watch you walk away". Of course I respond with "Enjoy the angle."

So I leave, find another group of drinkers, they seem chill, I talk to them, tell them my story, and they are understanding. They say things like, "yeah, that's messed up" and "what a bunch of punks". Then they tell me the guy's parents are gonna be home soon and I need to leave. So i say, "I don't mean any harm, I'll get out of your hair. Thanks for being so cool and understanding, unlike those other jerks that are so insecure, they have to chase me down in a pack of twelve to treaten to beat my behind."

I leave and start walking home. An old Bronco rolls up next to me and lo and behold, it's two of the kids I just talked to. I'm on the phone and they're like, "who ya talkin' to?" I tell them to leave me alone, I'm just walking home. There's two of them and a truck, and one of me, it's not like I'm gonna throw down, just leave me alone. They kept pushing and pushing and wanted to talk to my friend on my cell to see if i was telling the truth. I'm like whatever dude, I have no reason to lie. Run me over with your big manly truck or leave me alone. So they follow me and heckle me for a while before they finally take off.

Or so I think. Apparently the big one deiced to get out of the truck and walk with me. I'm like "okay, guy leave me alone, wtf". He's like "Dog, I'm just tryin' to feel you out. I mean you just stroll up to my house on your cell and start talking to everybody there, I don't know what to think right now." I say, "Are you serious? Have you never met a friendly drunk person before? I come in peace. I just wanted to share a story with you all, you seemed like chill people I could relate to and now you are following me home, I'm kind of creeped out." And he keeps rambling on with his nonsense. After following me for about a mile, he finally decides to leave me go, but asks for my number, like he wants to hang out and sh*t. I give him my real number cuz I know he's gonna call it immediately to see if I'm lying. He calls and it's me. He says, "yo, you real tight dog, I'll give you a call next weekend, we'll kick it." I'm like, "whatever".

He's called me three times since he left me. I think he wants buttsecks. WTF. First you wanna be cool, then you wanna throw down, now you wanna be cool. I'm betting all this guy wants to do is meet up with me again to fight me just because he's insecure. Of course I'm not answering the phone, I don't want to be friends with this f*cker.

Main point of my story: I find myself a pretty friendly guy, why does the world have to be an a$$hole to me? Why does every guy feel the need to fight? At college parties people aren't all crazy defensive like this. Stoners are cool. I figured my fellow suburbanites would be chill too. Apparently every tool with a collared shirt in STL thinks they need to throw down to prove their manliness. I'm gonna tell you something. I'm drunk right now, this took a lot of backspacing to make the spelling right, and I don't know why I wrote this, but comment as you may.

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[jimmclrk1 10+ year member]

Why are you just stumbling around like a drunken fool? I would be pretty sketched out, too.

 

[dan7532 10+ year member]

I don't know. Whenever I get drunk, I like to walk around and meet new people. I guess that creeps some people out.

 

[supa_c 5,000+ posts]

Cant say i have any empathy for under age drinkers

I wouldve ran you over and then eaten you.

Never had beer marinated chicken..its the same as drunk humans.

 

[dan7532 10+ year member]

wtf, I'm not asking for empathy. I don't care about your opinion on underage drinking. Try and act like you never had a sip of liquor before you were 21.

 

[yne721 10+ year member]

Cant say i have any empathy for under age drinkersI wouldve ran you over and then eaten you.

Never had beer marinated chicken..its the same as drunk humans.

so if he were twenty one this story would've been different? shut up.

 

[supa_c 5,000+ posts]

getting drunk and having a sip of liquor are completly different things.

 

[supa_c 5,000+ posts]

so if he were twenty one this story would've been different? shut up.

No, i still wouldve run him over and eaten him

 

[wu36ca 10+ year member]

I wouldn't have parties at my house becasue frankly I don't trust the people I do know. I can understand them being a little apprehensive about you being there since they don't know you, but the rest of it seems a little excessive.

 

[CJL 10+ year member]

I wouldnt feel comfortable is some random drunk guy tried to be friendly to me //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

 

[dan7532 10+ year member]

Why are you just stumbling around like a drunken fool? I would be pretty sketched out, too.

Enough to grab a buddy and chase me down in a truck and threaten to beat my face into the ground?

Why is it that all the guys that want to fight me always roll up deep while I'm by my lonely self. I guess I could take that as a compliment that they don't feel they could take me on alone. Or I could laugh at their insecurities. Whatever, I'm convinced people are ghey. I'm usually friendly to everyone I meet but lately I've just been sh*t on. F*ck everybody, most people ****.

 

[dan7532 10+ year member]

I wouldnt feel comfortable is some random drunk guy tried to be friendly to me //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

Yeah, but you could just ask him to leave. Or you could be cool STL county boys and act like your all cool and interested in talking to me, then chase me down in your truck or roll up 12 deep wanted to beat me into the bushes. I'm done being a nice guy.

 

[CJL 10+ year member]

I wouldnt try to beat up somebody who is drunk. //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/fyi.gif.9f1f679348da7204ce960cfc74bca8e0.gif

 

[Eugenics 5,000+ posts]

Sorry to hear that.

 

[MikeofTulsa Moderator]

wtf, I'm not asking for empathy. I don't care about your opinion on underage drinking. Try and act like you never had a sip of liquor before you were 21.

and what if i said i hadnt? im sorry, but i'd have a problem w/ some random drunk guy coming to my house. you'd have been shot for trespassing but thats just me.