May you be infested by a plague of 10,000 sand fleas.
May your genetalia start uncontrollably excreting a foul substance that no doctor can identify.
May you suffer any number of various incredibly painful ailments followed by a slow and excrutiatingly painful death.
The Australian Prime Minister rearranged his schedule to be present at Mr. Irwin's memorial services ~ he wasn't simply some country bumpkin who made a hit TV show out of nothing. He was/is an incredibly beloved figure to his fellow countrymen as well as other folks around the globe.
Definitely grounds for the loss of multiple cool points.