Slowing down relationships

[slim j 10+ year member]

I have been dating my current gf for about 6 months. Things are going pretty well and all. She has talked about moving in together, getting married, having kids, etc. I somewhat began to buy into the plan...thinking it would be good to settle down and start a family. As of late, I begin to feel very rushed into this thing and that I don't really want to do all these things. Sometimes she does things that I don't really like and I can just go home if they bother me....or I can stay at home for a few days to get over it or whatever.

If we move in together or get married, things that I could just walk away from I can no longer walk away. I feel like I would be stuck in the relationship forever.

In effect, if you wanted to slow things down; how did you go about it? How did she react?

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[crunktimes.com 5,000+ posts]

Umm just tell her you are not ready to move in together, a lot of times chicks will respect the honesty over just leading them on like you are down and really not being ready. I would not mention you want to me able to 'walk away' from arguments like you said just tell her you are not ready.

 

[skeptikal Premium Member]

I just moved in with my girlfriend a few months ago. We have been together for >3 years. It's not bad because we get along really well but we do have our moments. Nothing that a roadie around the block or 10 minutes in a different room can't fix. You just have to get used to their habits (the same that she had to get used to mine). It's rough at first getting used to having them around all the time but it's worth it //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/smile.gif.1ebc41e1811405b213edfc4622c41e27.gif .

In your situation 6 months is not a long time. Sh+t I was still getting laid 3x a day when we had been together for 6 months. So prolly not a good idea right now because you guys are still getting used to eachother but I don't know you or her so I can't really say.

And btw, Don't think for one second that you can't walk away from a relationship. Make yourself happy first.

 

[slim j 10+ year member]

I guess. I don't think she would let me go to the other room though. She is the type that wants to make it "all better" rather than letting me drop the issue. Dropping the issue is how I make things "all better"

 

[Pootie 10+ year member]

Just tell her how you feel /

 

[ace_800 5,000+ posts]

Depending on the type of chick u got, I would just tell her you need time or just don't pop the question until your ready.

Moving in is cool and you can still walk away if needed. Just make sure your ready for marriage don't rush that shit.

 

[klaze]

I have been dating my current gf for about 6 months. Things are going pretty well and all. She has talked about moving in together, getting married, having kids, etc. I somewhat began to buy into the plan...thinking it would be good to settle down and start a family. As of late, I begin to feel very rushed into this thing and that I don't really want to do all these things. Sometimes she does things that I don't really like and I can just go home if they bother me....or I can stay at home for a few days to get over it or whatever.
If we move in together or get married, things that I could just walk away from I can no longer walk away. I feel like I would be stuck in the relationship forever.

In effect, if you wanted to slow things down; how did you go about it? How did she react?

The only way to slow this relationship down with out completely ****ing it up.

Is to just ignore her advances of taking things further.

Smile and Nod but never agree or talk about anything in depth.

She starts not only making plans but actually doing things than thats when you can put yer foot down and say **** off.

if she is yer average insecure dumb ***** she will freak out and break up with you..

 

[Rookie_80 10+ year member]

If u're not ready or wanna slow down then def do not move in. I'm not even talking bout marriage.

It will be even tougher to slow the relationship down.

On the other hand if you're serious with this girl moving in has its own advantages--like reaching diff level of intimacy, u get to know person much better.

Plus if she's a good cook that's even better.

 

[slim j 10+ year member]

I am somewhat serious with this girl...I'd rather keep the relationship at a distance. I feel she won't be as accepting of this scenario.

 

[Rookie_80 10+ year member]

I am somewhat serious with this girl...I'd rather keep the relationship at a distance. I feel she won't be as accepting of this scenario.

All i know (and its personal opinion) i wudnt marry a girl that didn leave with me for some time.

 

[WhoSayWho? 5,000+ posts]

Spend the day listening to DMX -- I think some of his songs are pretty well on point when it comes to such issues.

 

[klaze]

I am somewhat serious with this girl...I'd rather keep the relationship at a distance. I feel she won't be as accepting of this scenario.

You are serious about her but you want her at a distance.

Yah that makes a lot of sense.

and it will make even more sense to her.

You can either try and be completely serious and tell her how you feel extremely blunt and straight up.

or just ignore and change the topic every time she brings it up.

 

[SethPhillips 5,000+ posts]

i didnt start hearing stuff like that till i was 3 year's in with my ex g/f.... i moved into her place after a year and a half.... then after 3 year's i decided to leave her ***** ***...

 

[Jmac 10+ year member]

I have been dating my current gf for about 6 months. Things are going pretty well and all. She has talked about moving in together, getting married, having kids, etc. I somewhat began to buy into the plan...thinking it would be good to settle down and start a family. As of late, I begin to feel very rushed into this thing and that I don't really want to do all these things. Sometimes she does things that I don't really like and I can just go home if they bother me....or I can stay at home for a few days to get over it or whatever.
If we move in together or get married, things that I could just walk away from I can no longer walk away. I feel like I would be stuck in the relationship forever.

In effect, if you wanted to slow things down; how did you go about it? How did she react?

First of all, moving in after 6 months of dating is stupid, let alone marriage and kids.
Secondly, tell her you don't feel comfortable moving in with her at this point.

Third, have *** with her sister, mother, and/or best friend.