I feel at home at CarAudio.com, because it doesn't really exist. And all of you, my virtual roomates, are as disconnected, materialistic, hollow, performance oriented, never-satisfied as me.
So what better place to vent my most sensitive offerings?
--
Last night, I died like twice in my dreams.
I thought I felt my girlfriend crawl in bed, but
it was really me, with a shaven head,
and I choked me out, it was scary
I poked out his eye in retaliation,
and it just crackled
until I woke up, and said
'****.'
So I went back to sleep, and had another dream
this time i was protecting myself
i'm certain to avoid misfortune.
Waiting outside a building, wearing
faulty night-vision
I heard some stairs creaking, even though
I was in my car.
I paid it no mind, and as I transitioned,
I thought I saw my objective in the distance;
But no, they were right on me,
And I died again.
'mmh. why.'
So I woke halfway, startled, but was still dreaming.
I felt a presence in the house, and
still spooked by the sounds of the stairs, I fled
into the street
where I was run down,
and stricken.
By someone I'll not mention.
'grr.'
So I woke up in bed,
This is pretty frustrating.
Rolled over, to catch some more zees,
and now my lover confesses cheating on me
it's all too vivid, i awaken from grief;
It's 4 AM,
and I'm afraid to sleep.
---
-Pride
Let's talk about
Stability infinity;
Seredipitous futility;
-Satire
How quirky a prose, it almost even amused me for a second.
Who said I had to be a constant?
Alongside what nonsense,
-Assertion
My rollercoaster never dips below par.
I felt like you owed me something, so I wrote it off,
jibbing towards equality.
-Disassociation
Average is the mean only because there's nothing
in between to call 'it'
'It' is the gap between true and false.
That's why they call it a gray area.
Who's that mediocre? And besides,
We grade on our own curves, it's
-Relativity
So my square root can beat up your cubic displacement,
But not alter the lowest common denominator,
However not allow it to be me;
I just don't feel comfortable
being the one underneath;
Perhaps I was driven,
or determined or doubted.
In an attempt to surround myself with taller beings,
I find I'm already six foot five;
-Revelations
Which is unfortunate, except in the case of a tidalwave,
in which case my head would still be above water while you lose yourselves in sand, and you could be my stepping stones.
Then new concensus averages out. Wouldn't that be neat;
-Reflections
Maybe I'm just not satisfied, maybe I have a guilty overtone;
Maybe I'm the only person I ever listened to.
The bottom line is somewhere else,
and I haven't seen it, but I can feel the depth on Monday.
-Ridiculous
---
i am
somewhere between here and
less than entertained
are you here to
catch and claim how
we
are
the
same
my better half, yet since defamed
flicker, flames
whom contents may contain
that which is
spreading through my veins
naturally, ha.
i'm sane.
and so do wonder you?
why so plain?
what have they regained;
conciousness.
recognance.
like gathered paper cranes
displacement game,
replacement veins,
more unexplained
much less retained
whats
my
****ing
name
---
disconnected
dissident
distant
dissatisfied
distasteful
disgusted
disguised
unkouth
unacceptable
unknown
unimaginable
unrelated
understood
---
had a dream, my best friend
we were
in my car
and he died
in an accident
on the wrong side of the road
i got out and walked
to the ramp
with a laptop
that wouldn't work
so i tore the screen off
a note says
'green and black wires;'
so i sat down
and tried to mend them
but they wouldn't mesh
i tried to go back
but couldn't get up
i see the clouds, i see the earth
and realize i had already died
and woke up on the other side
six of us, and i'm the newbie
you look kinda familiar
games, and questions
how long do i last here
how did you die
why aren't we in heaven or hell
how long have you been here
this is kinda fun, but
why are you looking at me
a holy war
a thousand friends
turned enemy and fiends
fight them off and flee
off to another mansion
to carry on and forth
again and again
until they decide my fate
so i jumped in my car.
that's what happened
when i died in my dream.
---
did i tell you that i stabbed you
did you know you ****ing bled
you should have seen the dreams i had
inside where shapeless heads
when i ask you what you think of that
will this be what was said;
i think i'm having second thoughts.
- they last a second long?
how come you're always smashing me.
- how come you're always wrong?
"there are igloos overhead,
there are waterfalls beneath."
of sound mind and tortured body,
upon you i bequeath:
the followings of migrant vagrants,
a drop of negligence.
a genocide, apocalypse,
holocaust kool-aid lips.
you cannot break me down to be
packed and shipped in crates
i think your soul weighs not enough
to cover cost of freight
succeed if try you mightly may
upon thin ice you skate
sitting on the dock i am,
and thusly, i will wait.
---
a hickory dickory mock of your sickery
brought to you by yours truly,
syringes in your eyes.
[x] don't show me this warning again
[x] don't have me make mice of men
[x] don't cry when i ****ing grin
[x] don't
[x] don't
[x] just
[x] don't.
anticipate crusted crumble-****
dismemberment capital stutter-****
why do i write in ****ing rhymes
because it keeps me ****ing thinking
why do i walk a crooked line
it's 'cuz your mugshot sent me drinking
when i'm with you, i like what i see
during those times when i'm
****ing blinking
qwerty piano
playing nuts
lyrics go
like huh?
and what?
it's because i just took a sledge-hammer to you
it's because i'm ****ing enamoured with you
above loomed "tainted enchantress moon"
whenever i saw, jawless ajar,
and spilt a cup of dubloon
blither-me, spewforth-you
aren't we in love, now.
have a taste of my tea.
---
i feel like, ****ing writing.
you taste like,
****ing,
fighting
whoever asked you anyway,
taken out back and shot
some broken legged briar are you
saddled stomach knots
i spy insides you hide despised
in the distance, echo, echo
from empty chamber, crate of null
to canceled aura, voided soul
i wouldn't expect you to know.
so it doesn't match your plan
so it doesn't match your shirt
and so it shall be written well
and so it shall be smirked
slink away aghast and standing
some 'devil pale moon' blah
danced beneath my cloudy cleats
hand-grenade your mardi-gras
me is to you as
**** is to ****
dig in
yes i like to write something well
and unjustify it with curses
of course i meant to make a point
fill in blanks; fill up purses.
---
whom, too concerned you may be;
me, we, she, you, he;
it has recently come to my attention
some **** has yes I am, intention
being
lack witnesses, regrets, retention;
you can. class not bare dimension
welcome,
re-invention
seek and dare thou shalt
intervention
so then, let me have your penchant
are yet you foreplay attention?
pride upon your chest-flesh pendant
drivel mind; men driven defendant
stage-face relocate, trigger tension
would have me mention
cannot be mended
alas derived pubescent winded
flourish wilting people blended
how'bout half off retail kindred
banishment, return soon sended
expression ended
one last man standing band. splended.
---
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
When people give you ****, .. hmm.
((vermin-goat-urinal)digested[-pekoe+infatuation](anti/(vinyl^charge-homeless))solo-cancer*cocaine)pretzel-manifold-capacitor/ash-exhaust*freudian(uppercut-wishbone)
Solve for X.
---
i know you missed the point and something changed
the click that didn't catch i slipped and
severed self regained a wealth uncommon
to attain the parts of me we know and
love not timed for be explained too
much maintenance faux fassad,
however that is spelt the
tie that binds my heart
and mind i stood, and
watched it melt i
hadn't even
touched it
when it
burned
my
fingertips
essence window
strength anew
rise, dispursion frey
looking back as now detached
i'm regular again
yes average
yes expendable
yes sensitive
ready, what?
---
Thanks for reading.
